Best 2022 Relationship Advice From Therapists
It seems like everyone has relationship advice. That doesn’t mean it’s good, or applicable in every relationship, and to be honest a lot of the time I see two pieces of completely contradictory advice that are actually both appropriate, just in different situations. So when MGB Relationships put together a list of the best relationship advice they’ve discovered in 2022, I had to take a look and see if any of it was actually useful.
First piece of advice: relationships thrive on intentionality
I think this is pretty solid. If you consistently make an effort for your partner, they’ll probably feel loved and appreciated and they should start to do the same for you. Admittedly, we all have moments when we let things slip a little, but when you catch yourself doing this, rectify it. You don’t have to plan a huge romantic getaway if that’s not the right thing to do, you can either: intentionally send a cute message to your partner, get them flowers, or pick out a movie to watch together.
Second piece of advice: passion won’t last forever
I’ve heard all sorts of statistics for this one that suggests that the over-the-top honeymoon period will last for between one to four years. Then our brains change. I think there’s no denying that things do start to settle down eventually, but that doesn’t mean that the relationship has to be done. Perhaps you can use some of the intentionality we mentioned before to create a sexy situation and have a passionate night, or you could just accept that you’re not all hot all the time and instead appreciate your love, closeness, and deeper bond.
Third piece of advice: give your partner the benefit of the doubt
In fiction, we all love a bad boy. In reality, we usually fall in love with someone because they’re good and kind. If you and your partner are struggling with something, try to work out if there’s a nice thought behind what they’re doing. Make an effort to understand their perspective and try to show them yours. Your partner shouldn’t be your enemy, so if it feels like they are, you need to adjust.
Fourth piece of advice: too much hope can cloud your judgment
We all idealise love a little bit in our relationships. I’ve seen so many friends act like their significant other is the most wonderful, beautiful person in the world, full of insight, intelligence and passion. Often, it’s just a little guy named Steve who’s slightly bald and likes trains. Now, it’s not surprising that my friends like their partners a lot – they should! – but let’s be honest, there’s no way that Steve is the pinnacle of humanity. Realising that your partner is a normal person, with lovely habits and annoying quirks, is pretty healthy. It also means that you’re setting Steve up with expectations that he can actually achieve, instead of putting way too much pressure on him. Steve isn’t going to boost your career, fix your relationship with your parents and make your tits less wonky, but he will make a lovely risotto and allow you to bitch about your colleague from accounting who won’t stop coughing.
Fifth piece of advice: work on yourself
It’s probably the most traditional advice, but it’s also solid. If you’re feeling unmoored, or like there’s not much going on for you, throwing everything into a relationship is a bad idea. It’s important to avoid building your life entirely around another person, especially at the start of a relationship. So if you’re feeling alone, instead of looking for a partner, try something else. What this is doesn’t really matter: you could build stronger friendships, work through issues with a therapist, do some volunteering, start new hobbies, push yourself to a promotion at work, or whatever you want. Become the sort of person you’d want to date – happy, successful, well-rounded – before you try to develop a new romantic relationship. If you’re looking for a little sexual satisfaction, buy a vibrator.
Honestly, relationships aren’t easy. Couples have passionate moments and bad spots, they feel lonely or flirty or struggle to be intimate. So perhaps I’d like to throw my own two cents into the mix. I think that the most important thing you can do to build a good relationship is to communicate. If you’re feeling happy and loved up with your partner, tell them that. If you’re struggling, find a way to articulate this. Working on relationships is the only way to improve them, and figuring out the correct way to do this will vary from couple to couple. So good luck out there, and I hope this advice helps!