The ‘ Tuesday Sex ‘ Trick That Could Save Your Relationship

How Scheduling Sex Can Save Your Relationship: A Coach’s Guide to Long-Lasting Intimacy for Couples, Inspired by Sex Education and Normal People

In the hustle of modern life, even the most loving couple can drift apart. Careers, children, and endless chores slowly replace the once-thrilling romance of the early days. If your sex life has turned into an occasional afterthought, you’re not alone. But there’s a surprisingly simple, science-backed solution gaining traction: Tuesday sex.

Yes, that’s right—scheduling sex on a specific day each week, namely Tuesday, can transform long-term relationships. It may sound like an odd idea, but this form of sex schedule is being praised by therapists, sexologists, and real couples for helping save your relationship. Here’s why it works—and how to make it work for you.

1. Why Tuesday Works: Breaking the Monday Fog and Beating the Weekend Rush

Let’s begin with timing. Monday night is often too draining. The week has only just begun, and most people are focused on work. By contrast, Tuesday offers a psychological “reset.” You’re far enough from the weekend to feel mentally clear but not yet buried in mid-week fatigue. It becomes the perfect opportunity to engage with your partner emotionally and physically.

According to leading sexologist Dr Orna Guralnik, choosing a regular day like Tuesday allows you to create a consistent experience of intimacy that feels dependable but not dull.

Making sex a planned part of your routine may seem counterintuitive, but consider this: we plan meetings, workouts, even meals—why not schedule sex with the person we love?

2. Anticipation Builds Desire: Turning Scheduling into Intrigue 

There’s a prevailing myth that sex must be spontaneous to be sexy. However, anticipation itself can be incredibly arousing. Planning a weekly sex date provides time to flirt, tease, fantasise, and look forward to your encounter.

This is especially effective when life feels busy and intimacy has taken a backseat. A sex schedule doesn’t kill the mood—it creates one. Knowing it’s coming builds intrigue, which is crucial to reigniting the spark in long-term relationships.

3. Routine Doesn’t Mean Boring—It Means Commitment 

Scheduling Time for Connection and Strengthening Emotional Bonds 

Think of Tuesday sex as your version of an emotional appointment. When done consistently, it starts cementing a regular connection, which gradually strengthens your emotional and physical bond.

Instead of hoping that desire strikes on its own, you’re choosing to invest in your connection with a partner. Over time, this ritual becomes a comforting anchor—a form of sex that establishes a connection beyond just physicality.

4. It Respects Differences in Libido and Desire 

How Couples With Mismatched Drives Benefit from Scheduling Sex

One of the most common issues in any relationship is mismatched libido. One partner is ready to jump into bed at the drop of a hat, the other prefers a slower emotional build-up. The Tuesday sex model helps bridge that gap.

By making intimacy a shared responsibility, neither partner feels they’re constantly initiating—or avoiding. Many couples report that once they begin the act—even when they initially weren’t “in the mood”—their bodies catch up emotionally.

This aligns with the idea that sexual interest can be responsive, not always spontaneous. The act of beginning often leads to enjoyment, even if it didn’t start with desire.

5. It Replaces Pressure with Playfulness 

When you treat sex like a romantic date night, complete with candles, music, or even themed ideas, it becomes something fun to prepare for—not a task to dread. You’re not just carving out time to get naked—you’re indulging in the kind of weekday sex that establishes both fantasy and emotional reconnection.

Whether it’s a sensual massage or a light-hearted role play, planned sex allows you to explore new things together. It makes space for pleasure in ways that chaotic life simply doesn’t.

6. It Normalises Communication Around Intimacy 

Many people fear that bringing up the idea of scheduling sex sounds clinical or desperate. But in truth, it opens the door to better communication. You begin talking not only about penetration but also about:

• Your needs
• Your boundaries
• What makes you feel good
• How to satisfy each other in non-sexual ways, too

The best relationships aren’t built solely on lust but on the ability to emotionally connect. Talking about sex and making it a shared goal can rekindle what once felt lost during the honeymoon phase.

7. Real Couples Say It Works—And Research Backs Them Up

Real stories from couples show how Tuesday sex can restore intimate relationships. One woman said she made it a policy always to accept her lover’s advances on Tuesdays, even when she wasn’t initially in the mood. Her reasoning? “He might not be asking in another 10 years.” That promise led to deeper affection and consistent bonding.

Other couples noted that choosing Tuesday helped them stick to a routine, balance other commitments, and keep the flame alive even amidst parenting, stress, and ageing.

TV shows like Normal People, which explore realistic sex scenes and romance, highlight how genuine intimacy is more about trust and emotional honesty than wild spontaneity.

How to Get Started with Tuesday Sex

If you’re ready to try it, here’s how to integrate Tuesday sex into your relationship:

1. Add it to your shared calendar. Label it creatively (e.g. “Private Wellness Hour”).
2. Treat it like a date: prep the space, shower, dress up if you’d like.
3. Talk about your boundaries, preferences, and desires beforehand.
4. Don’t stress about having full intercourse every time. Cuddling, a deep kiss, or a massage count too.
5. Stay flexible—if one Tuesday doesn’t work, reschedule. But schedule sex again next week.

Final Thought: Scheduled Sex Is Intentional Love 

When we set aside time for intimacy, we’re doing more than having sex. We’re saying, “You matter.” We’re honouring a regular connection and strengthening emotional trust. We’re showing up for one another—not just once, but regularly.

Don’t let life crowd out your most important bond. Bring back sex when their partner offers, with love, patience, and purpose. Let Tuesday sex become a sacred space in your week—a bold, beautiful move to save your relationship.

Rachel Hall

Rachel Hall, M.A., completed her education in English at the University of Pennsylvania and received her master’s degree in family therapy from Northern Washington University. She has been actively involved in the treatment of anxiety disorders, depression, OCD, and coping with life changes and traumatic events for both families and individual clients for over a decade. Her areas of expertise include narrative therapy, cognitive behavioral therapy, and therapy for traumatic cases. In addition, Rachel conducts workshops focusing on the psychology of positive thinking and coping skills for both parents and teens. She has also authored numerous articles on the topics of mental health, stress, family dynamics and parenting.